Here is the BBC News —

There is no more corruption in the UK.
There is only suicide.

Just when you thought that corruption in high places was an inevitable symptom of the UK's Government, Banks, Local Authorities, major corporations and all the other institutions you assumed could be trusted.

Think again!

You can rest assured that crime has now been eliminated in this country.
There is no such thing as death by criminal negligence, as in this cases of abused children. Murder has been completely expunged. There is only one form of demise that is accepted by the powers that be. Suicide. (Unless, of course, it happens to be justified, such as in cases of voluntary euthanasia, when it then becomes a heinous crime against society).

Anyone who has the temerity to die in questionable circumstances which directly, or indirectly, involves the Government, will almost certainly have committed suicide.

The deaths of several young recruits at Deep Cut Barracks? Obviously, suicide.

The death of the weapons expert Professor Tom Harris over the 'Weapons of Mass Destruction' scandal? Self inflicted, Suicide.

John Charles de Menezies? Seven fatal gunshot wounds to the head. Has to be self-inflicted. Suicide.

Princess Diana? Undoubtedly a self induced accident. Almost certain to be suicide.

Be sure not to upset the incumbent authority, or you too will be committing suicide, whether you choose to or not!

Forget Swine Flu. At the current rate of suicides in the UK we may justifiably consider ourselves in the midst of a pandemic!